MISS PEACH'S COZY COTTAGE

Welcome to the COZY COTTAGE. This is the furever home of the memory of Miss Peach, our 18 year old Devon Rex angel kitty. I am Miss Hunny Bunny, she asked me to pour you a cuppa catmint tea as you read our old fashion mewsings about this and that. Please come by often...one lump or two? Now our precious Hunny Bunny is also an angel cat...please let me be your hostess at the cozy cottage...my name is Miss Hope.



Remember...only in our tomorrows will we realize what we had in our yesterdays.

Monday, November 3, 2008

MESSAGE FROM THE QUEEN!!!!



(hey...don't ask me why this one is so small!)


I just got this message below from the QUEEN! Holy Cats!! We better straighten up and fly right!! I don't know what is going to happen if we don't...but this I will tell you...I am moving to Kansas. I have liked it there and think it is one of the best places I ever lived! Having afternoon tea is my kind of thing...that one will fly high with me!
Subject: ~~~~Message from the Queen~~~~
To:~~~~ The citizens of the United States of America~~~~
From:~~~~Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth III~~~~
In light of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. (You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.) Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except Kansas , which she does not fancy). Your new Prime Minister, Gordon Brown, will appoint a Governor for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed. To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect: ----------------------- 1. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour,'favour,' 'labour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced by the suf fix '-'ise.'Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. (look up 'vocabulary'). ------------------------ 2. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as ''like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. There is no such thing as U.S. English. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into account the reinstated letter 'u'' and the elimination of '-ize.' ------------------- 3. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday. ----------------- 4.You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then you're not ready to shoot grouse. ----------------------
5. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. Although a permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public. ---------------------- 6. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour. -------------------
7. The former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling gasoline) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it. ---------------------
8. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with catsup but with vinegar. -------------------
9. The cold, tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is
not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. South African beer is also acceptable, as they are pound for pound the greatest sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are also part of the British Commonwealth - see what it did for them. American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's
Urine, so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion. --------------------- 10. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie Macdowell attempt English dialogue in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater. --------------------- 11. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies). --------------------- 12. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of America . Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will let you face the South Africans first to take the sting out of their deliveries. -------------------- 13. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad. -------------------- 14. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776). ----------------------- 15. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 p.m. with proper cups, with saucers, and never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus strawberries (with cream) when in season.
God Save the Queen!
PS: Please scroll down and bid on the Maui Pearls and the Fuzzy Calico Sisters...we have kitty friends in need! PLEASE!

16 comments:

michico*Adan said...

This is very exciting.
Although I am so far away, but news keep going on and on everyday~!
The big day is almost there!

The Dutchess said...

WOW..well I like the tea with strawberries and cream! On the Hilltop we follow the news..and hope for the best!

goldenshade said...

That was great!!!!!

Wonderful suggestions. Love the veg peeler idea! MOL

purrs Goldie and Shade

Mickey said...

Good Morning Sunshine!!!!! <3
That was indeed an interesting letter ;)
We already use the "u" on our colourful words and we are already metric. As for much of the rest....
I hope you had a wonderful time at Dr Tweety's party yesterday!!! It was pawsome :)
Hugs & Kisses,Moonshine

Kaz's Cats said...

Hi Miss Peach,

Thanks for posting that letter - Mum thought it was very funny!

Purrs

Gypsy & Tasha

Bounce, Lucy and Trixie said...

Uh oh the Queen is onto us. I sure hope she doesn't send the Redcoats!

Dianna said...

Does she realize that she doesn't really rule in England? That she's just a figurehead monarch?

Cheysuli and gemini said...

I am putting my bid in for Prime Minister. First the Colonies.. then the World... this could be the Way to Total World Domination!!!! YES

However, I have one caveat--no tariffs to the East India Company. Last time that got the Monarchy in a bit of a pickle--or rather a tea party.

Isis said...

Oh boy I'd certainly vote for strawberries and cream at 4pm daily with yummy cups of tea too! :)

Purrs,
Isis
x

Birgit said...

Klasse, dass Du mit diesem Post mit in die US-Wahlen einsteigst, Karla. ich hoffe, die Wahlen gehen so aus, dass der richtige Präsident am Ende im White House einzieht.
LG Birgit

Stefanie said...

Very exciting !!!
We wish you for the election the best result.
We have everthing in the news here at the other side of the world.

Karla ich werde morgen alles im Fernsehen verfolgen.

Liebe Grüße
Stefanie und Luna

Zippy, Sadie and Speedy said...

Ohoh, time for another revolution! Sometimes mom writes colour and thinks it's hysterically funny when some peepul say "yoo know" and "like" constantly and wonder why she walks away while they're still talking...and please, don't 'axe' her. You may ask her a question but if you try to axe her she will kill you with her vegetable peeler. Mmm, tea, always in a china cup tho sometimes without a saucer and with some home made cookies (biscuits). Since she can't vote for Chey, well she could but they say Chey can't be purresident, she will vote Obama.

BeadedTail said...

What a funny message! I'm originally from Kansas so found it funny that that state would be exempted!

Lorianna said...

Hi dear Mommy Karla and Miss Peach!
That letter was very cute! My maternal Grandparents were Irish and Scots- English, so I could get used to some of those things. ;) Mandatory Teatime would be nice. Perhaps the Queen would step aside and allow Sir Paul McCartney to rule? :)
I am very excited to learn that I won the kitty pin! I will send the money for it as soon as possible!
I meandered around my gardens today, saying goodnight to my plants. They are taking a long time to go to sleep this year, but the foilage is starting to turn mellow yellow.
I hope your week has started out wonderfully! Sending Love and Hugs to you and sweet little Peach,
Lorianna

Jimmy Joe said...

Those are a lot of changes! Momma read them to me pretty seriously until she got to the one where we are all supposed to play with crickets, and then we all started laughing.
Your buddy, Jimmy Joe

Evie/VampyVictor said...

Hahaha Mis Peachies! That as the best letter!!It wox very funny!
Shh it's a little secret, but this is how the rest of the world does see those little bits of America hehe

hehe Nancie boys!! heheh

V-V